picture post :)

i don't really like it when all i see on my blog are word posts after word posts.

am gonna hang up some pictures here.

colourize this place a lil :D

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i always have to force her to take pic with me...
though she grumbled, this turned out pretty nice ♥



my first bite of tutti frutti !
baby sis belanja-ed me. hee.



and yes. i forced her to take this one too.
lol.

psyco-ed her to geta pair of converse with me xD
hardly 2 weeks old. and they're already covered in mud.



laa... no more hanging out till she comes back in june :/

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i don't admit it much...
but i miss her.
i don't show it much...
but i like having her around.

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till our next rendezvous.



♥


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in class.... once more.

my brain operates at such a speed where even snails find offensive.

i sounded so dumb with the lecturer and the 32 other students looking at me. wondering what in the world i was trying to say.

couldn't compose short, witty answers even though the questions were about me. super fail at being spontaneous. i had time. wasn't even the first one to be called.

it's like i don't know myself.

questions shot at us:

• what's your name
• where you're from
• what you're doing
• how much do you know about research
• what do you hope to obtain at the end of this course

i struggled at answering all those questions. only managed to blurt out my name without getting it wrong. i got so tongue tied. stammered. syntax, grammar all fail. stringed a few random words together and mumbled them out.

listening to the others talk about themselves... pouring out glamourous infomation... sharing their ambition... they sounded so confident and mature. they know. they know what they want. what they're doing. while i shrunk in my seat... feeling small and puny.

honestly, what i had in mind at that time were all rubbish and nonsensical answers. typical for childish-forever-stuck-in-that-stage me.

i have zero idea on what i'm doing or where i want to go. i have no solid plans for the future and i dont even know why i'm doing this. probably just escaping from making further decisions in life.

besides, it's not only that i don't know myself well. it's now more obvious then ever that I fail to speak well in front of large groups. super awkward and stutter like no body's business. gahHH. i sound like such a geek.


***


on a different note, am really glad to be in class again. sitting down listening, absorbing, learning, hearing bout things i never knew existed, taking notes. can't be happier. absolutely calms me down and i even managed to relax a bit; with it being such a nice contrast to the never ending hecticness and fast pace at the workplace which drains all the life out of me.

as a good friend of mine once said: it's just the beginning.

which it really is. assignment all not piling up yet.

let's hope i'll be able to survive this.

*fingers crossed*



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Emotional Affairs

no no... i'm not in one. at least not right now, or have not for a really long time... just sharing something i've read cause i think that tonnes of people do fall willingly or even unrealisingly into an Emotional Affair (EA). it's not deadly or anything, but if does have great effect on a person, especially if he/she is in a relationship and we all fail to realise that. effects, mostly adverse, aren't exactly fun to deal with. awareness is what we all lack. read on. pretty good stuff i promise. and it most certainly won't be a waste of your time.

favourite quote from the article:

Don’t believe everything you think.

the mind is a great paradox – it is possible to be fooled by your own thinking.

Click here for the full post:

EMOTIONAL AFFAIRS – The Truth

or visit:

http://www.stopstressingnow.com/2012/02/emotional-affairs-the-truth/


EA.

have you been in one?
or are you in one right now?

do you realise that you're in the danger zone?
or are you 100% aware that you're playing with fire and lovin' it?


whatever it is, i won't judge.


random thought: the person who wrote this must have been pretty involved in EAs to understand so much about them.


happy Friday peeps!

ps:// Avril concert is TOMORROW!!

am so gonna camp there ;D



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Bad.

The mud in a field.
The foul play of a match.
The turbulence on a flight.
The rotten bits on an apple.
The lousy ending to a good movie.


All bad.


In your eyes, i'm all that.

Everything i do, fails to touch you.

Till the day i die, i'll never be good enough for you.


giving up feels like the most probable option here. regardless of how hard i push, it'll go nowhere. you don't see that i try. you don't feel what i care. you don't think that i'm doing enough. i'm at a roadblock. i really don't know what to do anymore.


heart. halts.


heart. cracks.


heart. bleeds.



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